In 1970, Robert Townsend, the CEO who had turned around a failing rent-a-car company called Avis, published what is arguably the best book written on business management.
It’s Up the Organization: How to Stop the Corporation from Stifling People and Strangling Profits.
Though published 42 years ago, it should be required reading–for CEOs and consumers.
Don’t fear getting bogged down in a sea of boring, theory-ridden material. As Townsend writes:
“This book is in alphabetical order. Using the table of contents, which doubles as the Index, you can locate any subject on the list in 13 seconds. And you can read all I have to say about it in five minutes or less.
“This is not a book about how organizations work. What should happen in organizations and what does happen are two different things and about as far apart as they can get. THIS BOOK IS ABOUT HOW TO GET THEM TO RUN THREE TIMES AS WELL AS THEY DO.”
Comcast is the majority owner of NBC and the largest cable operator in the United States. It provides cable TV, Internet and phone service to more than 50 million customers.
So you would think that, with so many customers to serve, Comcast would create an efficient way for them to attain help when they face a problem with billing or service.
Think again.
Consider the merits of Townsend’s short chapter on “Call Yourself Up.”
Townsend advises CEOs: “Pretend you’re a customer. Telephone some part of your organization and ask for help. You’ll run into some real horror shows.”
Now, imagine what would happen if Brian L. Roberts, the CEO of Comcast, did just that.
Brian L. Roberts
First, he would find that, at Comcast, nobody actually answers the phone when a customer calls. After all, it’s so much easier to fob off customers with pre-recorded messages than to have operators directly serve their needs.
And customers simply aren’t that important–except when they’re paying their ever-inflated bills for phone, cable TV and/or Internet service.
Comcast’s revenues stood at $16.8 billion for the third quarter of 2014.
In 2013, Roberts earned $31.4 million in salary, options and other compensation, a 7.7% increase from his $29.1 million compensation package in 2012.
So it isn’t as though the company can’t afford hiring a few operators and instructing them to answer phones directly when people phone in.
But instead of being directly connected to someone able to answer his question or resolve his problem, Roberts would hear:
“Welcome to Comcast–home of Xfinity.”
Then he would hear an annoying clucking sound–followed by the same message in Spanish.
“Your call may be recorded for quality assurance.
“To make a payment now, Press 1. To continue this call, Press 2.”
Then he would hear: “For technical help, press 1, for billing, press 2. For more options, press 3.”
Assuming he pressed 2 for “billing,” he would hear:
“For payment, press 1 For balance information, press 2. For payment locations, press 3. For all other billing questions, press 4.”
Then he would be told: “Please enter the last four digits of the primary account holder’s Social Security Number.”
Then, as if he hadn’t waited long enough to talk to someone, he would get this message: “Press 1 if you would like to take a short survey after your call.”
By the time he heard that, he would almost certainly not be in a mood to take a survey. He would simply want someone to come onto the phone and answer his question or resolve his problem.
Then he would hear: “At the present time, all agents are busy”–and be electronically given an estimate by when someone might deign to answer the phone.
“Please hold for the next customer account executive.”
If he wanted to immediately reach a Comcast rep, Roberts would press the number for “sales.” A sales rep would gladly sign him up for more costly products–even if he couldn’t solve whatever problem Roberts needed addressed.
Assuming that someone actually came on, Roberts couldn’t fail to notice the unmistakable Indian accent of the rep he was now speaking with.
Not Indian as in American Indian–because that would mean his company had actually hired Americans who must be paid at least a minimum American wage for their services.
No, Comcast, like many other supposedly patriotic corporations, “outsources” its “customer service support team” to the nation, India.
After all, if the “outsourced” employees are getting paid a pittance, the CEO and his top associates can rake in all the more.
Of course, the above scenario is totally outlandish–and is meant to be.
Who would expect the wealthy CEO of a major American corporation to actually wait in a telephone queue like an ordinary American Joe or Jane?
That would be like expecting the chief of any major police department to put up with hookers or panhandlers on his own doorstep.
For the wealthy and the powerful, there are always underlings ready and willing to ensure that their masters do not suffer the same indignities as ordinary mortals.
Such as the ones who sign up for Comcast TV, cable or Internet services.

ABC NEWS, ADMINISTRATION, ATTORNEYS, BUREAUCRACIES, BUSINESS, CBS NEWS, CEOS, CNN, CORPORATIONS, CUSTOMER SERVICE, FACEBOOK, FBI, GOVERNMENT AGENCIES, L.G., LG, MSNBC, NBC NEWS, POLICE DEPARTMENTS, PROSECUTORS, ROBERT TOWENSEND, SELF-HELP, THE CHICAGO SUN-TIMES, THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE, THE HUFFINGTON POST, THE NEW YORK TIMES, THE SHARPER IMAGE, THE WALL STREET JOURNAL, THE WASHINGTON POST, TWITTER, USA TODAY
“YOUR CALL IS VERY IMPORTANT TO US”: PART ONE (OF TWO)
In Bureaucracy, Business, Self-Help, Social commentary on December 14, 2014 at 9:08 pmHow many times have you called a government agency or company and instantly found yourself put on hold?
To add insult to injury, you usually wind up serenaded by recorded music that would be totally forgettable if it weren’t so unforgivably irritating.
And every 30 seconds or so a recorded voice comes on to assure you: “Your call is very important to us.”
Have you ever wondered: “If my call is so important to you, why aren’t you answering it?”
The truth is that most companies and government agencies don’t want their employees speaking with the customers who make their existence a reality.
Having your questions answered by another human being requires the company/agency to assign–and pay–people to do just that.
Most hiring managers don’t want to hire any more people than they absolutely have to. Assigning people to answer customers’ calls means that many of those calls will take time to answer, because some problems can’t be solved in a matter of seconds.
This is especially true when the problem involves technology.
(Technical support employees of computer/software companies are notorious for advising customers to “just put the Restore Disk back into your computer and restore it back to default.”
This wipes out your problem–and everything you’ve saved on your computer. It also gets you off the phone quickly with Tech Support.)
To a bean-counting executive, time is money. And that’s money that won’t be going into the pockets of some already overpaid CEO.
Even government agencies like police departments don’t want to spend any more time than necessary taking the calls of those who need to reach them.
Even calls to 911 can leave you talking to no one, with only a recorded message telling you to wait until someone deigns to speak with you.
That’s why many bureaucracies arrange that when you call for help, you’re fobbed off with a recorded message telling you to visit the company’s or agency’s website.
This assumes, of course, that
If you
you’re flat out of luck.
And the agency/company couldn’t care less.
But it need not be this way.
Companies and agencies can treat their customers with respect for their time and need for help.
That’s why companies that genuinely seek to address the questions and concerns of their customers reap strong customer loyalty–and the profits that go with it.
One of these is LG, which produces mobile phones, TVs, audio/video appliances and computer products.
LG actually offers an 800 Customer Care number that’s good 24-hours a day.
Its call center is staffed with friendly, knowledgeable people who are willing to take the time to answer customer questions and guide them through the steps of setting up the appliances they’ve bought.
Another company that dares to have human beings stand behind its products–and explain how to use them–is The Sharper Image.
Recently, Dave, a friend of mine, bought an electronic alarm clock that allows you to wake up to a variety of exotic sounds–such as a thunderstorm, the seashore, chirping birds or foghorns.
A brochure on how to set the alarm and sounds came with the clock, but Dave couldn’t make sense of it. Luckily, there was an 800 number given in the brochure for those who needed to be walked through the necessary steps.
Dave called The Sharper Image and quickly found himself connected with a friendly and knowledgeable customer care rep. She clearly and patiently explained what he needed to do to choose which sounds he wanted to awaken to.
And then she just as patiently repeated that list of steps while he quickly typed them up for future use if he forgot what to do.
Such an approach to customer service is not new–just extremely rare these days.
In his 1970 bestselling primer on business management, Up the Organization, Robert Townsend offered the following advice to company CEOs: “Call yourself up.”
“When you’re off on a business trip or a vacation,” writes Townsend, “pretend you’re a customer. Telephone some part of your organization and ask for help. You’ll run into real horror shows.
“Don’t blow up and ask for name, rank and serial number–you’re trying to correct, not punish. Just suggest to the manager (through channels, dummy) that he make a few test calls himself.”
So how do you cope with agencies/companies that don’t care enough to help their customers?
I’ll address that in my next column.
Share this: